Asumming that $[e_1, e_2] = [e_1, e_4] = [e_2, e_4] = [e_3, e_4] = 0$ we have
$$
\operatorname{Nor}_\mathfrak{g}(\mathfrak{q})
=
\begin{cases}
\langle e_1, e_2, e_4 \rangle
& \text{if $\alpha \neq 1$}, \\
\langle e_1, e_2, e_3, e_4 \rangle
& \text{if $\alpha = 1$},
\end{cases}
$$
where $\langle - \rangle$ denotes the linear span. (The computation can be found below.)
We first consider the case $\alpha \neq 1$.
Then
$$
\operatorname{Nor}_\mathfrak{g}(\mathfrak{q})
= \langle e_1, e_2, e_4 \rangle
= \langle e_1 + e_2, e_2, e_4 \rangle
$$
with the three generators being a basis.
Therefore
$$
\operatorname{Nor}_\mathfrak{g}(\mathfrak{q}) / \mathfrak{q}
= \langle \overline{e_2}, \overline{e_4} \rangle,
$$
where $\overline{x}$ denotes the residue class of $x \in \operatorname{Nor}_\mathfrak{g}(\mathfrak{q})$, and the two generators being a basis.
Because $e_4$ is central in $\mathfrak{g}$ we find that $\overline{e_4}$ is central in $\operatorname{Nor}_\mathfrak{g}(\mathfrak{q}) / \mathfrak{q}$.
So $\operatorname{Nor}_\mathfrak{g}(\mathfrak{q}) / \mathfrak{q}$ is the two-dimensional abelian Lie algebra.
Consider now the case $\alpha = 1$, i.e. $[e_2, e_3] = e_2$.
Then
$$
\operatorname{Nor}_\mathfrak{g}(\mathfrak{q})
= \langle e_1, e_2, e_3, e_4 \rangle
= \langle e_1 + e_2, e_2, e_3, e_4 \rangle
$$
with the four generators being a basis.
Therefore
$$
\operatorname{Nor}_\mathfrak{g}(\mathfrak{q}) / \mathfrak{q}
= \langle \overline{e_2}, \overline{e_3}, \overline{e_4} \rangle
$$
with the three generators being a basis.
As before we find that $\overline{e_4}$ is central, but in this case we also have the addition relation
$$
[\overline{e_2}, \overline{e_3}] = \overline{e_2}.
$$
So $\operatorname{Nor}_\mathfrak{g}(\mathfrak{q}) / \mathfrak{q}$ is the direct sum of the two-dimensional non-abelian Lie algebra $\langle \overline{e_2}, \overline{e_3} \rangle$ and the one-dimensional (abelian) Lie algebra $\langle \overline{e_4} \rangle$.
Edit: I computed the normalizer $\operatorname{Nor}_\mathfrak{g}(\mathfrak{q})$ as follows: We have
$$
[e_1, e_1 + e_2] = [e_2, e_1 + e_2] = [e_4, e_1 + e_2] = 0
$$
and
$$
[e_3, e_1 + e_2]
= - [e_1 + e_2, e_3]
= - [e_1, e_3] - [e_2, e_3]
= - e_1 - \alpha e_2.
$$
So we have $e_1, e_2, e_4 \in \operatorname{Nor}_\mathfrak{g}(\mathfrak{q})$, independent of $\alpha$.
If $\alpha = 1$ then
$$
[e_3, e_1 + e_2]
= - e_1 - \alpha e_2
= - e_1 - e_2
= -(e_1 + e_2)
\in \langle e_1 + e_2 \rangle
= \mathfrak{q},
$$
so in this case we also have $e_3 \in \operatorname{Nor}_\mathfrak{g}(\mathfrak{q})$ and thus $\operatorname{Nor}_\mathfrak{g}(\mathfrak{q}) = \langle e_1, e_2, e_3, e_4 \rangle = \mathfrak{g}$.
If $\alpha \neq 1$ then $-e_1 - \alpha e_2$ is no scalar multiple of $e_1 + e_2$, and thus $e_3 \notin \operatorname{Nor}_\mathfrak{g}(\mathfrak{q})$.
In particular $\operatorname{Nor}_\mathfrak{g}(\mathfrak{q}) \neq \mathfrak{q}$, which is why $\operatorname{Nor}_\mathfrak{g}(\mathfrak{q})$ is at most three-dimensional.
Because $\operatorname{Nor}_\mathfrak{g}(\mathfrak{q})$ already contains the three linear independent elements $e_1$, $e_2$ and $e_4$ we also know that $\operatorname{Nor}_\mathfrak{g}(\mathfrak{q})$ is at least three dimensional.
Hence $\operatorname{Nor}_\mathfrak{g}(\mathfrak{q})$ must be three-dimensional and thus equals its three-dimensional subspace $\langle e_1, e_2, e_4 \rangle$.