$+$ is a function taking two variables (which we write on both sides of the operator, but we could write $+(1,2)$ and $+(2,1)$ as well). $1+2$ and $2+1$ are the outputs of the function for two different inputs. The properties of addition imply that both those numbers are equal.
Showing that they are equal may not be completely trivial. For example, the addition can be defined inductively in terms of the successor operation $s$ (which is such that $s(0) = 1$, $s(1) =2$ etc.) by the following :
\begin{align}
\forall n \in \mathbb N, &n+0 = n \\
\forall n,m \in \mathbb N,& n+s(m) = s(n+m)
\end{align}
Using those, we have :
\begin{align}
1+2 &=s(0) + s(s(0)) \\
&= s(s(0) + s(0)) \\
&= s(s(s(0) + 0)\\
&= s(s(s(0))) \\
&= 3
\end{align}
and
\begin{align}
2+1 &= s(s(0)) + s(0)\\
&= s(s(s(0)) + 0 ) \\
&= s(s(s(0)))\\
&= 3
\end{align}
so both are equal. Showing that $n+m = m+n$ for all integers $n,m$ is done by induction. (So the proof is not completely trivial)
Edit
In other words, there is a syntactic different between $a+b$ and $b+a$, but the axioms we use for $+$ imply that there is no semantic difference.
Sums of more than two terms are usually defined in term of the binary operation. In this case, parentheses are mandatory if we want to be really precise at the syntactic level ie, we should write $a+(b+c)$ for $+(a, +(b,c))$ and $(a+b)+c$ for $+(+(a,b),c)$.
Here again, the axioms for $+$ implies that it is associative, ie the two expression above are always the same semantically. Therefore, when syntax is not the main focus, we often neglect the parentheses and write $a+b+c$.