$
\def\l{\lambda}\def\o{{\tt1}}\def\p{\partial}
\def\E{{\cal E}}
\def\M{{\mathbb M}}
\def\LR#1{\left(#1\right)}
\def\BR#1{\Big(#1\Big)}
\def\sabs#1{\operatorname{abs}\LR{\l,#1}}
\def\ssgn#1{\operatorname{sign}\LR{\l,#1}}
\def\trace#1{\operatorname{Tr}\LR{#1}}
\def\qiq{\quad\implies\quad}
\def\grad#1#2{\frac{\p #1}{\p #2}}
\def\c#1{\color{blue}{#1}}
\def\CLR#1{\c{\LR{#1}}}
\def\BM{\c{\M}}
\def\fracLR#1#2{\LR{\frac{#1}{#2}}}
\def\gradLR#1#2{\LR{\grad{#1}{#2}}}
$Instead of the non-differentiable $\tt{abs()}$ function consider this "soft" version parameterized by $\:0\lt\l\ll\o$
$$\eqalign{
&B = \sabs{X} \doteq \LR{X\odot X + \l J}^{\odot\o/2}
\qquad\qquad\quad \\
&B\odot B = X\odot X + \l J \\
&B\odot dB = X\odot dX \\
&dB = S\odot dX \\
}$$
where $J$ is the all-ones matrix and $S$ is the "soft sign" function
$$\eqalign{
&S = \ssgn X \doteq X \oslash B \\
&X = B\odot S \\
&B\odot dS = \BR{dX - S\odot dB}
= \BR{J - S\odot S}\odot dX \\
&dS = \fracLR{B\odot B-X\odot X}{B\odot B}\odot\frac{dX}{B}
= \fracLR{\l J\oslash B}{B\odot B}\odot dX \\
}$$
where $\{\odot,\oslash\}$ denote Hadamard multiplication and division.
These differentials can be converted into gradients with the aid of
a 6th-order tensor $(\M)$
$$\eqalign{
&\grad BX
= S:\BM, \qquad \grad SX
= \fracLR{\l J\oslash B}{X\odot X+\l J}:\BM
\qquad\qquad \\
}$$
Note that these "soft" functions are perfectly well-behaved as $X\to 0$
$$\eqalign{
&\lim_{X\to 0} B = {\sqrt\l} J, \qquad \lim_{X\to 0} S = 0
\qquad\qquad\qquad\qquad \\
}$$
and so are their gradients
$$\eqalign{
&\lim_{X\to 0} \gradLR BX = 0, \qquad
\lim_{X\to 0} \gradLR SX = \frac{J:\BM}{\sqrt\l} \;\doteq\; \frac{\E}{\sqrt\l} \\
}$$
where $\E$ is the 4th-order identity tensor with components
$\:\E_{ijkl} = \delta_{ik}\,\delta_{jl}$
The usual "hard" functions are recovered for $\l\to 0$, and as long as no component of $X$ is equal to zero the gradient expressions can still be evaluated
$$\eqalign{
&\grad BX = S:\BM, \qquad \grad SX
= \fracLR{\l J}{B\odot B\odot B}:\BM = 0 \\
}$$
However, for any $X_{ij}=0\,$ the corresponding components of
both gradients and $S_{ij}$ are undefined, although $B_{ij}=0$ remains well-behaved.
It is possible to define $S_{ij}=\o\,$
at $\,X_{ij}=0,\,$ which will allow $S$ and $\gradLR BX$ to be evaluated.
Assuming $X_{ij}\ne 0$, you can apply the above ideas to your function (with $\l=0$) to obtain
$$\eqalign{
Y &= X + A\odot S \\
dY &= dX + A\odot 0 \\
\grad YX &= \grad XX \;=\; \E \\
}$$
or you can use "soft" functions $(\l\ne 0)$ and not worry about $X_{ij}=0$
$$\eqalign{
Y &= X + A:\BM:S \\
dY &= dX + A:\BM:\fracLR{\l J}{B\odot B\odot B}:\BM:dX \\
\grad YX &= \E + \fracLR{\l A}{B\odot B\odot B}:\BM \\
}$$