The short answer is: let $i' = \neg b \land a$ and $j' = \neg a \land b$.
But I only could arrive at this solution after I quit using the above definition of quotient by and ideal $I$ and learned that the following one is equivalent:
$$ a \equiv b \text{ if, and only if, } a \vartriangle b \in I$$
where $a \vartriangle b = (a \land \neg b) \lor (b \land \neg a)$, which is called the symmetric difference between $a$ and $b$. That is:
$$ \exists i,j \in I: a\lor i = b \lor j ~~\text{ if, and only if, }~~ a \vartriangle b \in I$$
The "if" part goes as follows: As $I$ is closed for all elements of the boolean algebra which are less than some element of $I$, both $a \land \neg b$ and $b \land \neg a$ are in $I$:
$$ a \land \neg b \in I ~~\text{ and }~~ b \land \neg a \in I \tag{1}$$
and then:
$$ a \lor (b \land \neg a) = (a \lor b) \land (a \lor \neg a) = a \lor b = (b \lor a) \land (b \lor \neg b) = b \lor (a \land \neg b) \tag{2}$$
For the "only if" part observe that by the definition of least upper bound of $b$ and $j$ it follows that $b \leq a \lor i$. From this it can be seen that $b \land \neg a \leq i$. Similarly $a \land \neg b \leq j$ and as $I$ is closed by sups, $a \vartriangle b \in I$:
$$ \text{if } a \lor i = b \lor j \text{ with } i,j \in I \text{ then } a \vartriangle b \in I \tag{3}$$
Another property of the symmetric difference is in order: $$a \vartriangle b = \neg a \vartriangle \neg b \tag{4}$$ Summing all this up:
$$\begin{gather}
a \lor i = b \lor j ~~\text{ with } i,j \in I \tag{Hyp.}\\
a \vartriangle b = \neg a \vartriangle \neg b \in I \tag{3, 4}\\
\neg a \lor (\neg b \land \neg\neg a) = \neg b \lor (\neg a \land \neg\neg b) \tag{2} \\
\neg b \land \neg\neg a ~\text{ and } \neg a \land \neg\neg b \in I \tag{1}
\end{gather}$$
As $\neg\neg x = x$ in any boolean algebra, the result follows.